compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (chibi tsuzuki)
Did this because I do *not* want to do my Geometry homework. Triangles suck.

It's harder than it looks! Copy and paste to your own journal, erase my answers, and add your own.

Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real places, names &/or objects, but nothing made up! Try to use different answers if the person you got this from has the same 1st initial. You CAN'T use your name for the boy/girl name question. And Have Fun With It!!!

So, I did it with my LJ name and my real name, and here are my answers.

My LJ name
1) 4 LETTER WORD: Carp
2) BOY NAME: Carl
3) GIRL NAME: Candice
4) OCCUPATION: Coroner (tee hee, cool, dead things)
5) A COLOUR: Cerise (that's a color, right?)
6) SOMETHING YOU WEAR: Corset, if you're being fancy or goth.
7) BEVERAGE: Crush! Orange Crush!
8) FOOD: Cake. OMG, carrot cake. That's double Cs... I should get extra points for that!
9) SOMETHING FOUND IN A BATHROOM: Comb? Or crusty bathtub, either one...
10) A PLACE: Canada, the land of love.
11) REASON FOR BEING LATE: Crazy Christians showed up at my door trying to sell me Bibles, and when I tried to explain that I was going to be late, one of them hit me over the head with their Bible and knocked me out, stuffed me in the trunk of their car, and when I woke up, they were forcing me to watch those annoying Christian channels where you listen to ministers preach... oh, and I was drugged.
12) SOMETHING YOU SHOUT: Christ on a crutch! (All the time...)

My real name
1) 4 LETTER WORD: Mile
2) BOY NAME: Marcus
3) GIRL NAME: Melissa
4) OCCUPATION: Mailman... or Man-whore, whichever you prefer. ^^
5) A COLOUR: Maroon
6) SOMETHING YOU WEAR: Mismatched socks
7) BEVERAGE: Minute Maid lemonade
8) FOOD: Meatloaf
9) SOMETHING FOUND IN A BATHROOM: Masking tape. Yes, I have masking tape in my bathroom. Shut up.
10) A PLACE: Manhattan
11) REASON FOR BEING LATE: Munchkins from the land of Oz kidnapped me and sold me into slavery for the Wicked Witch of the West, who was forcing me to be a door-to-door vacuum cleaner salesperson.
12) SOMETHING YOU SHOUT: Merde! (Thank you, French class...)
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (Default)
These are excerpts from the six-novel series that I wrote. More stuff for Raychell, probably... Anyway, the first bit is from the beginning of the second book, during their summer vacation. Something fluffy to contrast the utter heartbreak of the other things I posted here... she'll know what those are, which book they're from, and why I chose to post it, no doubt.

This is for you, radioactive-x. Again.

Random Warren crap )
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (L smile)
We're reading Romeo and Juliet right now in my English class. Out loud, in parts.

I get to play Mercutio.

I got to give the entire "Queen Mab" speech. XD

And the best part?

My teacher doesn't get most of the lines she's telling me to say.

My God, I love this play.
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (Default)
First of all, are any of my flist into Death Note?

Secondly, check out my new default icon! It's Death Note-related... *sigh*

Third... I wrote a Mello drabble. For those of you into DN loveliness...

Days Like This )
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (Default)
It's nothing too important, I try to tell myself. It's just the way she is, the way she plays, whether it be weak and distant over the phone or her laughter in my ear as we wait for the bell to ring at school.

Her hands clutch at her notebooks, and my hands grip mine possessively to my chest. Our stories are something shared, something we can trade off with one another as easily as trading off the looks of disappointment on our faces. Because this isn't what either of us expected, this slow longing that pulls at our chests. I know she can feel it too, every time our hands brush and each time we share an awkward laugh.

We can share fiction. We can put all of our fears and desires into characters that we think are better than us... or at least I do. Characters determined to become clean, women fighting for respect and men trying to scrub away the sins that eat away at them. People that want to be better, smarter, people that desire to be looked at as someone worth seeing.

Am I worth seeing, anymore? I used to be, as our lazy touches became a little more heated, as her mouth pulled into that sweet smile. But now, our hands avoid one another's. We touch only when we must, only as we say goodbye before we part ways.

This isn't what I wanted. This isn't what I need.

And it's nothing too important. It's just her, words flying at me and hitting my heart like daggers even though deep down, I know it's a joke. I think it's a joke.

"You're just a little slow," she likes to tell me, with a small laugh. And I smile weakly back, thinking that next time I'll do better, next time I won't deserve having been called something less than what I am. I know I'm not worth it, I realize that I can never be enough for her requirements.

I can't reach her standards of what I should be; as knowing as she is, as quiet as she wants me to be. She does want me to just be silent, sometimes, to not fling jokes right back at her... to just take the faux-insults she gives me with a smile and not say anything in return.

She doesn't mean it. She loves me, or at least she says she does. I'm not sure what to believe anymore, to be honest. But I'm perfectly content to remain this miserably unhappy, as long as it makes her smile.

I don't mind unhappiness. I've received it so many times before, concealing the bitterness with smiles and laughter and stories and chocolate. I let my close circle of friends know that I'm truly happy with the way things are, that nothing could possibly be wrong -- can't they hear the way I laugh?

But inside...

Inside, I'm decaying. I'm flaking away under the harsh pressure she gives me.

I'm... dying, as much as it hurts to think about.

And I do it for her smile.

Music Meme

May. 10th, 2008 02:24 pm
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (chibi tsuzuki)
So I ended up playing the music meme that's been going around because apparently, I'm a sheep.

I have a few Harry/Ron things in there, two Sideswipe/Sunstreaker things, and a few ficlets for my original story. Everything is around PG or PG-13, depending on how picky you wanna get with ratings.

I have no idea how I got these ideas in my head from the given songs... my iTunes can get very strange sometimes. XD

Have fun!

Everybody say 'Baa-ahh' )
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (Default)
Title: Halfway There
Author: compos_dementis
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: Harry/Ron
Rated: Adult for mild cursing and sex
Warnings: male/male sex, language, major character death, age difference
Disclaimer: Not for profit, just for fun. All characters belong solely to J.K. Rowling and her wild imagination.
Summary: It had been seven years since Ron’s death when something unexpected happened.

Halfway There )
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (chibi tsuzuki)
This is basically a response to the Warren chapter I posted earlier, “Habits.” This is about Daniel now and the reasons he treated Warren the way he did. Another reference tool for radioactive_x, I suppose, but mostly to show her that Daniel shouldn’t be a hated character.


Chapter 14: Skies

The Daniel Chapter )
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (Default)
OMG, I'm posting H/R fic again... *checks temperature*

I'm back from my anime hole? Huh. Imagine that.

Title: Bitter
Author: compos_dementis
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: Harry/Ron, implied Harry/Ginny if you squint
Rated: PG for mentions of death and sex
Warnings: implied character death.
Disclaimer: Not mine. No harm, no foul. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Summary: The air is bitter, and the pillow’s cold, and Ron doesn’t feel the same as he used to.
Bitter )
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (Default)
This is to vent my depression. Just a warning.

Title: Before I Sleep
Author: compos_dementis
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: Harry/Ron gen
Rated: PG
Warnings: I don’t warn.
Disclaimer: The characters and universe are the sole property of JK Rowling. This story was not for profit.
Summary: “Miles to go before I sleep, and miles to go before I sleep…”
Before I Sleep )
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (happily plotting death)
My English teacher, bless her black, cold heart, told us to pick a topic and write a 5-paragraph MLA report about something having to do with Greek mythology.

Just to show her that just because I'm agreeing to do this without a fight, I'm not giving up yet... I chose a topic that is bound to make her UberChristian, Bible-thumping mind despise me, if possible, more than she already did.

God, I love English class.

My MLA Report )

Oh Lordy

Mar. 28th, 2008 02:34 pm
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (happily plotting death)
Hello flist!

Sorry I haven't posted in... *counts*

...OMFG FEBRUARY.

*ahem*

Right. Well. This is a post to say that I'm still not dead. I posted a little yesterday (memes, a short story) but I haven't told you where I've been. I've been busy with school stuff -- learning about Greek mythology now -- and stressing out because apparently my stepmother's pregnant.

Yes, my wicked stepmother is pregnant.

*groans*

My fanfiction muse is obviously broken... So I've been burying myself in my original stories. I've got the one about the wizard school (the prep, the dyke, the nerd, and the flaming gay boy) and I've got the one about the vampires and werewolves (cranky French werewolf falls in love with a spastic vampire boy) and now I've got the Warren/Warren story written with radioactive_x.

Oh boy.

Been playing Guitar Hero (2 and Rocks the 80s), reading (Picture of Dorian Gray, Stranger in a Strange Land), drawing (original characters), and writing.

Been... bored.

Out of my skull.

*dies inside*

*and a little outside*
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (I kiss girls)
Her "Insanely large meme" post had me cracking up... so I stole it.

I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay... )
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (freakin' fabulous hufflepuff)
1. Your rock star name (first pet, current car): Crow Kia

2. Your gangsta name (fave ice cream flavour, favourite type of shoe) Double Fudge Sneaker

3. Your Native American name (favourite colour, favourite animal): Orange Raccoon

4. Your soap opera name (middle name, city where you were born): Elaine Merced

5. Your Star Wars name (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 of your first name): ChaMa

6. Superhero name (2nd favourite colour, favourite drink): Yellow Pepsi

7. NASCAR name (the first names of your grandfathers): Danny Lee

8. Stripper name (the name of your favourite perfume/cologne/scent, favourite candy): Mandarin Spree

10. TV weather anchor name (your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter): Chastain Charleston

11. Spy name (your favourite season/holiday, flower): Summer Poppy

12. Cartoon name: (favourite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now): Pear Hoodie

13. Hippie name (What you ate for breakfast, your favourite tree): Cereal Redwood
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (chibi tsuzuki)
This is a short bit from the series I wrote, taken from the sixth (and last) book about my gay boy's past. I posted it as a reference tool for radioactive_x, but feedback from my friends in general is widely appreciated.

Note: There are forty chapters in the sixth book.

Chapter Thirty-Nine: Habits )
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (removed soul for sarcasm)
Oh my Gosh!

How much can happen in a few weeks of non-LJ time?

Just to let you guys know, I'm not dead. (Don't look so disappointed!) I've been in the Real World, reading manga and watching anime.

Onnakitty, I just finished Fruits Basket and fell in love. My OTP is Yuki/Kyo (duh) although Tohru's pretty cool, too. Kyo is my all-time favorite, with Shigure and Ayame a close second.

And little Momiji! *squeezes him*

I've also been checking out Death Note. Saw the first few episodes on YouTube and fell in love. Now I'm on the sixth manga and going bonkers with the L/Light lovin'. They are adorable, are they not? Angst love is my favorite kind of love.

I had a Yami no Matsuei party and invited a bunch of my friends. Draco came over, and so did my gf, Carina, and a ton of my other buddies that I like to hang out with. They all loved it because it's TEH UBER SLASH OMG and because Tsuzuki is a fluffy puppy.

Hmm... I was sick all last week and missed the entire week at school, still managing to ace all the make-up tests. I went out for cheap Chinese with my mom and talked to my friends on the telephone, you know, the good stuff.

I wrote lots of fanfiction, but none of it was Harry Potter-related, I'm sorry to say.

If any of you can rec me any Fruba fanfic (or Yami) that would be fantastic. All the stuff I've found on FFN sucks.

I'll be posting again here in a few seconds, so don't hate me.
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (chibi tsuzuki)
Yes, I'm playing the character meme. Shut up.

1) Make a list of 10 characters.

2) Assign each character a number.

3) Without telling anyone who's on the list or the character's assigned number, get questions from your flist about what they'd like to know about them. e.g. "If 3 and 4 were trapped in a cave together with only a blanket and a toothpick, what would they do?" (The more random the better!)

4) Post the answers and who was who on the list.


1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.

HINT: It's multi-fandom!
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (Default)
I had a dream the other night where I murdered my ex-girlfriend.

Not a good dream, to say the least.

I wrote a sonnet about it, for class, and I think it freaked out my English teacher.

Also? I feel like I'm going to be sick.

I'm so depressed.

Wish

Jan. 3rd, 2008 05:13 pm
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (harry/ron scar)
I could have sworn that I didn't want to hear it at the time.

Her voice, soft and... dare I say gentle, over a long-distance telephone conversation. That tone made my chest ache and made me yearn to see her again, to just get a glimpse of her blonde, blonde hair or her blue, blue eyes.

But I didn't want to hear it. A part of me protested at her words that she confessed into my ear, but a larger part of me wanted to take it into consideration, to feel the response I wanted to say leave my mouth.

She had been crying, and I could tell from the way her voice was constricted. Too appropriate, I think, the none too gentle pull of guilt on my heart, the flood of tears in my eyes. I listened to her statement and tried -- believe me, I tried -- to ignore the way she left me feeling, left me thinking, left me wishing...

"I want you back."

Those aren't the words I wanted to hear from her, especially when my relationship is currently going so well with another girl.

I responded the way I was supposed to. The proper way, the professional way, a way in which my mother would be proud. It was forbidden to return to her warm embrace, even when my girlfriend now is still mostly just my friend, hands shaking as we touch, giving only chaste kisses for fear of destroying our previous friendship.

To go back would be a betrayal, and I told her so, and it hurt to hear her sobs on the phone.

"I'm sorry," I responded, and I was a good girl, and I didn't tell her I still love her, didn't let her know how I feel.

But her words -- "I want you back..."

A part of me wanted to run, and a larger part of me still wanted to run back into her warm, loving arms.W

Poetry

Jan. 3rd, 2008 05:08 pm
compos_dementis: Picture of anime Mello with gothic M (not denial)
A poem that I wrote, dedicated to all the relationships out there that just didn't quite work out.

Out of Reach )

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